- Excerpt
GOVERNMENT CREEP:
What the Government is Doing
That You Don't Know About
by Philip D. Harvey
INTRODUCTION
The excerpt, below, is about a man who breaks
the "low-flow law" by
smuggling a full-power toilet from Mexico into the United States. This
story is just one of 17 in the book, GOVERNMENT CREEP, that
illustrate the small, borderline restrictions of liberty that together
have eroded our U.S. Constitutional rights. Harvey documents recent government
incursions into private matters, usually at the expense of the public
and for the enrichment of a select few.
Philip D. Harvey is president of the adult products
firm, Adam & Eve,
and the social marketing non-profit, DKT International. His previous books
include The Government vs. Erotica, which documented his eight-year,
$3 million battle with the U.S. Justice Department, and Let Every Child
Be Wanted, an analysis of contraceptive marketing and U.S. foreign
policy.
More information about the book, GOVERNMENT
CREEP, and
author Phil Harvey, follows the excerpt. Enjoy!
Waste Products
by Philip D. Harvey
Paul was going to have to smuggle a toilet in from Mexico. It had been
nearly impossible to get a high-flow toilet in the United States since
1999. There were a few available on the black market as a result of careful
salvaging from the demolition of older buildings, but now, if you needed
a high-flow toilet, smuggling from Canada or Mexico was the best alternative.
It wasn't illegal to bring in a foreign toilet for your own use, but
no one in the U.S. could sell you one.
There was no question that Paul and Rachel needed a high- flow toilet.
The one the kids used was beyond repair and the new low-flow models, mandated
by federal law to use no more than 1.6 gallons per flush, wouldn't be sufficient
when the camp kids were in the house.
Paul and Rachel ran a day camp for three two-week periods every summer.
They had as many as fifteen kids engaged in nature walks and biology lessons,
plus splashing around in their wading pool and using their bathroom. These
kids used lots of toilet paper. One of their regulars, a rambunctious nine-year-old
named Elise, actually brought her own toilet paper with her. Her mother
insisted Elise was allergic to the chemicals in most brands.
Paul and Rachel's regular plumber did not want to discuss the details
of obtaining a high-flow toilet. It was illegal for the plumber to buy
one or sell one and, as far as contractors were concerned, there weren't
any exceptions without government permission.
Paul could fill out a long series of forms which might or might not result
in official authorization for a larger- tank toilet, but the process was
both lengthy and risky. If he was turned down, the subsequent installation
of any illegal toilet might come to the attention of the toilet police,
perhaps rising to very high levels in Washington.
Paul pleaded with the plumber. Paul told him
that his plumbing contractor in New York City had cooperated when he'd
had a bidet installed in his apartment there. Bidets had been illegal
in Manhattan for decades. But Paul and his first wife, Seana, lived
in Manhattan and Seana wanted a bidet. The plumber told him, "Sure, we just have to get the inspection done before
the bidet is put in." You can buy bidets in Manhattan -- you just
can't install one.
When the work was in progress, Paul stood by as the waste line for the
bidet was stuffed with newspaper -- a farcical camouflage of its intended
use. The inspectors arrived, looked it all over, presumably took whatever
bribe they were entitled to for overlooking the illegal connection, and
signed the necessary papers.
At Paul and Rachel's day camp house, there was no such flexibility on
the matter of illegal plumbing. High-flow toilets were out and there was
no plumber or contractor who was willing to provide one. The Mexican import
would take two months. Meanwhile, Rachel called Don's Johns and had a temporary
portable latrine set up for the kids on the hillside that led down to the
river. The portable johns used a lot of chemicals, which bothered Rachel,
but you had to make some compromises.
~ What's Happening Here ~
In 1994, Congress passed a low-flow toilet law,
mandating that all new toilets sold in the United States of America
operate on 1.6 gallons of water per flush (gpf), compared with the
typical 3.5 gpf previously. Even politicians seem a little embarrassed
about this. Everyone seems to recognize that it is idiotic for the
federal government to be in the business of mandating toilet design.
Jokes abound. "Homeowners all across
America... are frustrated to tears with this kind of government meddling.
So we're going to flush them out," remarked House Majority Leader Richard
K. Armey (R-Texas) in 1999.
The amount of water "saved" by this pointless
law is trivial. All of America could go back to using outhouses tomorrow
and it would have little impact on water consumption. The real water
waste is in the subsidized irrigation of crops in 19 western states,
consuming more than 80 percent of our national water supply. But that
doesn't much interest the toilet police, for whom saving water isn't
really the point.
Instead, the government, spurred on by a handful of enviro- zealots who
find it more satisfying to control other people's lives than to address
serious issues of water conservation, is following its normal busybody
instincts, forcing us to do its bidding in our bathrooms.
This same law, by the way, mandates low-flow
shower heads, so it is getting harder and harder to have a satisfying
shower. One response has been the installation of second "body" shower
heads, thus confounding the purpose of the law by doubling the (otherwise
reduced) flow of water.
Americans prefer to laugh about this kind of petty-seeming paternalism
because the inconvenience is increasingly minor. But what conceivable business
has the government in our toilets anyway? Is it really so funny that the
government is creeping into our bathrooms, into our bathtubs, into our
very commodes?
Copyright ©2003 by Philip D. Harvey.
All Rights Reserved. Please feel free to duplicate or distribute this file
as long as the contents have not been changed and this copyright notice
is attached. Thank you.