- Excerpt
A LIFE IN BALANCE:
Nourishing the Four Roots of True Happiness
by Dr. Kathleen Hall
INTRODUCTION
Dr. Kathleen A. Hall is a student of Dr. Dean Ornish at the
Preventive Medicine Research Institute and Dr. Herbert
Benson at Harvard University's Mind-Body Institute. "I
received a Ph.D. in suffering and reverence for life," says
Dr. Hall, and when you see her bio, you'll understand.
Dr. Hall was the perennial go-getter, hawking cookies and
milk in grocery store aisles as a child, and supermoming
her way to a position as a top Wall Street broker. After a
stress-induced crash, she went Walden, holing up on a farm
in rural Georgia.
From there, she pursued a degree in divinity from Emory
University and studied under Bishop Desmond Tutu, Jimmy
Carter and the Dalai Lama. She took her religious teachings
to heart and worked for a battered women's shelter, an at-
risk youth program, then as chaplain in a hospital where
she got that Ph.D. in human suffering.
In her new book, Dr. Hall teaches from the center of the
mind-body-spirit triangle and shows how all the pieces fit
together to form a life of true happiness. The excerpt
below is called "The Four Roots of True Happiness" and
describes how Dr. Hall reacted when a friend told her she
was "living an insufficient life."
The Four Roots of True Happiness
by Dr. Kathleen Hall
As I looked at the menu and drank my coffee, I was feeling
satisfied with my life. Our farm and the horse operation
were the products of many years of hard work, and my
education was finally over with the completion of my
doctorate and with one daughter in college and the other in
medical school. Here I was eating breakfast at my favorite
restaurant, The Flying Biscuit, waiting to meet a new
friend of just a couple of months. Susan walked in late
after seeing her last patient in the clinic and we started
the usual chit chat about kids, husbands, our careers, and
politics.
After a great lunch, including those famous hot biscuits
covered with cranberry apple butter, we headed to our cars.
As I fastened my seat belt I thought it was one of those
moments that you just feel great to have a good friend and
your life is in a quiet flow, when all of a sudden Susan
stopped outside of her car and turned around and came back
to my car. I rolled down my window and smiled, "What's
going on?"
Susan looked troubled and leaned against my car. She said,
"I don't know how to tell you this. I tried to talk to you
about this at lunch but I just didn't know how to say it.
So here it is. You may never speak to me again after I say
this but I have to say this. Kathleen, you are living an
insufficient life." She patted me on the shoulder and
walked away to her car and drove off.
I sat there in a state of shock. I couldn't move. Did I
hear her right? How could anyone tell someone else they
were living an insufficient life? What kind of real friend
would do that? I raced from rage to panic then to confusion
then back to rage again. I decided to put it out of my
mind. After all, she had only known me for a few months and
she didn't know how far I had come from that afflictive
family of my childhood to now. She didn't know the
insurmountable odds I had overcome. Who was she to tell me
I was living an insufficient life? I chose to block her
words out of my mind and return to my well-designed life.
There was only one problem. Those words began to haunt me.
I repeated the question as I brushed my teeth. The question
ruminated in my mind as I showered, drove my car, sat in
meetings, as I ate dinner. "Am I living an insufficient
life?"
~ Are You Living An Insufficient Life? ~
I will forever be grateful for the courage of my friend
Susan that day. Susan had a fresh look at her new friend's
life and she saw so much more potential in my life than I
could. My life could not go on the same way. The panic
attacks at the top of the World Trade Center may have begun
my journey, but this charge by Susan catapulted me into a
more profound challenge.
I chose to spend time in self-examination and ferret out
how my life could be insufficient. It took a few months,
but many things eventually surfaced. This is what happens
when you have the intention to find an answer to questions
in your life. What I discovered was my need for security
and my fears of success and failure had paralyzed me. Again
I realized that stress and fear are partners. I was trying
to create my life to avoid or side-step my fears. I had
created a prison of my own making and told myself not to
ask for anything more, because life was stable and I was
afraid to risk the dream that was smoldering in my heart.
But now there was no turning back. Susan had thrown down
the gauntlet. I would not die living a safe, insufficient
life.
If I wanted to live a sufficient life, an intentional life
discovering real happiness, I had to begin by being honest
about myself, where I was an where I wanted to go. What I
began to understand was, with the four roots as my
grounding, understanding and overcoming the stress rooted
in my fears became a process of learning, like taking
another class. Stress ceased to be terrifying and something
to be avoided, risked, and feared, and became something to
embrace and share with others in this journey.
Are you living an insufficient life? There are millions of
individuals around the globe who would be stopped in their
tracks if they were asked this question. Be grateful you
are hearing this question right now. What if it was near
the end of your life, when even more of your life had
passed you by, and you were asked this question? This
profound question stressed me out but it was one of the
greatest gifts I have ever received. It drew me inward and
downward to a great exploration and adventure to discover
what my purpose was in my life and now I know what real
happiness and balance is.
I had finally achieved the benchmarks of success that were
on my to do list: a great career in the financial world, a
successful husband, two "perfect" children, a great home,
grand cars, a housekeeper, a second home, jewelry, and
status. After a lifetime of hard work and sacrifices, I had
finally arrived at the destination of my desires when the
hollow aching feeling seeped into my soul. I was lonely,
tired, and overwhelmed. Stress shadowed my life. I had done
such a good job at keeping this haunting stress at bay, but
I was finally tired of my life. I became fascinated by the
people who were motivated by stress and by the individuals
who crumbled and became the victims of their stress-filled
lives.
~ A Journey Within ~
It was at this intersection of my life when I saw the PBS
television series created by Bill Moyer, called "Healing
and the Mind." Mr. Moyer had traveled the world to seek out
the most noted people and institutions working in the area
of mind-body medicine. Mind-body medicine was the
burgeoning field where science was beginning to research
how certain practices of the mind directly affect the body.
These research centers focused on various conditions such
as cardiac disease, cancer, stress-related conditions,
hypertension, pain, and depression.
These cutting-edge research centers developed practices
that were creating the emerging fields of alternative,
complementary, and blended medicine. I was captivated and
decided to leave the financial world and enter this new
world of mind-body medicine. Spirituality had fascinated me
since my childhood, so I decided to enter this field and
explore the relationship between mind, body, and soul. I
spent many years in post-graduate work learning the tenets
of classic spirituality.
After my three years studying for a Master's of Divinity
and the four years spent to complete my doctorate in
Spirituality, I decided that I needed practical training
and experience in various spiritualities and spiritual
practices to better understand the mind-body connection
from the spiritual aspect. I studied with Christian monks,
priests, and nuns, Jewish Rabbis, Buddhist monks, Hindu
priests, Taoist monks, a Sufi leader, and Native American
shaman from various tribes. Over many years I studied with
renowned spiritual and religious leaders, such as Dr.
Thomas Keating, a Christian Trappist monk who wrote the
seminal work on "Centering Prayer," which is the art of
Christian meditation; His Holiness the Dalai Lama, a
Tibetan Buddhist; Thich Nhat Hanh, a Vietnamese Buddhist
monk; Bishop Desmond Tutu; Arun Gandhi, the grandson of
Mahatma Gandhi; and president Jimmy Carter.
During this time I chose to enter clinical training with
the medical doctors doing pioneering research in this
emerging field. I learned from cardiologist Dr. Dean Ornish
at the Preventive Medicine Institute the approach he used
so effectively with his cardiac patients. His program
involved diet, exercise, stress reduction, and group
support. His results drew great interest in the medical
field, and the most prestigious research institutions in
the world began asking whether and how Dr. Dean Ornish's
cardiac rehabilitation and wellness program was actually
reversing heart disease. They were intrigued that if this
method was actually reversing heart disease, what promise
it could hold for healing other diseases, such as cancer,
hypertension, insomnia, obesity, and diabetes.
I studied with Dr. Herbert Benson at Harvard University's
Mind Body Institute, where he was using a similar method
with his patients and was experiencing impressive results
with his research. Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen at the Institute
for the Study of Illness and Health in Bolinas, California,
was using a comparable approach with cancer patients and
experiencing great outcomes, and I headed to Bolinas to
learn more about how Dr. Remen was using these methods with
cancer. I learned mindfulness meditation from Dr. Jon
Kabat-Zinn who has done groundbreaking work in the area of
mind-body medicine at the Stress Reduction Clinic at the
University of Massachusetts.
It intrigued me how similar approaches to disease,
wellness, and healing were being used by different
physicians for various diseases all over the world. All of
these research centers were advocating the relaxation
response or meditation. I was fascinated by the research
studies on the healing effects of meditation on the mind
and the body. I decided to study meditation and experience
firsthand what effect it had upon me.
The great medical research centers of the world were
mirroring what the great spiritual and religious leaders
had been practicing for mental, physical, and spiritual
well-being. Now I was really on fire. The two disciplines
of medicine and spirituality had merged into the field of
mind-body medicine. What I discovered about these newly
integrated disciplines of medicine and spirituality was
when individuals practiced the mind-body model, they became
healthy and happy. My one foot was in the mind-body model
and my other foot was firmly planted in the spiritual
model.
There are practices that can keep us holding onto the
promise and experience of our own happiness, balance, and
well-being. These practices are a culmination of the
merging of good science, basic psychology, and classic
spirituality. The four roots are about you staying in the
center of your life during the most difficult of
circumstances. As you learn about the four roots, you will
learn how to nourish and strengthen "your" center, listen
to "your" self, and be connected to your Source. These
practices have brought me a life of happiness and balance
and have literally saved my life and the lives of countless
others I have had the privilege of working with in my
career.
I began working this four-part plan with myself, and then
used these methods with groups of patients with various
medical maladies -- patients with cancer, heart and
pulmonary diseases, obesity, anxiety and depression
disorders, stress and sleep disorders, hypertension,
depression, menopause, and more. The individuals and groups
I worked with experienced impressive results almost
immediately. It was thrilling.
~ What Are the Four Roots of Real Happiness? ~
Research is beginning to show us these four roots create
real happiness and health at a very key level of our
existence. The four roots -- Serenity, Exercise, Love, and
Food (or S.E.L.F.) -- have an essential effect on our
chemical processes of the body.
For an example, something as simple as taking a warm shower
or going for a walk for a few minutes increases the
production of serotonin in the body. This is also true for
participating in a group of some kind, such as playing
cards, joining a book club, or meeting with a friend.
Similar serotonin increases occur when you eat
carbohydrates during your busy day.
The key to living a life of balance and experiencing real
happiness is for you to begin to make informed choices
about your lifestyle. When you choose to live an
intentional life of real happiness, you will enjoy learning
how nourishing these four roots can bring you a dynamic
life of balance.
I worked with children who were at risk in the inner city
who had lost hope and any sense of purpose in their lives.
I used these four practices with amazing results to
disadvantaged youth in the inner city. I have taught these
resources to high school and college students, teachers,
professors, clients, and business executives, only to
experience that their lives have been transformed by having
real tools to work with.
These four practices became roots for the people in my
work. I learned to augment these four practices and expand
their meaning in my programs. These four essential healing
elements in life rooted each individual's life through
cancer treatments, heart disease, the death of a child, the
loss of a job, depression, the stress of raising a family,
or living through the hell of insomnia. As I observed the
abundant miraculous changes in peoples lives I felt as if
each person was a tree with four basic roots and it was my
responsibility to teach them about what their roots are and
how to nourish them. It seemed like these folks were
growing like a healthy tree, developing new lives with rich
fruit, stronger branches, and lots of new growth.
~ Bill's Story ~
Bill was referred into our cardiac rehab program after he
suffered a major heart attack. He had been a senior-level
executive at a major Fortune 500 company and had retired
after thirty years of work, but he had never been out a day
of work in twenty years. Bill loved his work, his
coworkers, and his company.
He came into the rehab group quite depressed and made it
clear he did not want to be in this group of "sick people."
His attitude was not unusual for many patients who enter
cardiac rehab. There is great resistance when a successful
individual develops a serious illness and is forced to stop
their busy life and learn self care.
It was such an adventure for Bill entering the group as he
began to learn and eventually enjoy learning the four roots
of self care. As he learned more about how to eat,
exercise, love, and manage his stress, he became more
passionate about the possibility of reversing his heart
disease. He began to look forward to our weekly meetings
and eventually became the resource person for our group.
Searching the Internet, reading voraciously, and opening
his curious mind, he treated his experience with the four
roots as if he were acquiring a new company and needed to
learn everything about this new venture. I am very happy to
say it has been five years since Bill entered our lives and
he is not only happier and healthier than ever before, he
has not had another cardiac event.
~ Elizabeth's Story ~
Just after returning from M.D. Anderson Hospital, Elizabeth
walked into my office, sat down in silence and stared at
the floor. Elizabeth was a 37-year-old woman, with a
husband and two children. She told me that she had very
aggressive cancer and her prognosis was not good. They told
her even with her chemotherapy and radiation, her odds were
very small that she would survive.
I gave her literature and studies on the four roots of self
care and told her that I would work with her in any way I
could. She learned about the foods that boost her immune
system, how exercise increased her immune function and how
stress reduction practices and participation in a support
group elevate the healing hormones of your body that helped
her immune function.
Elizabeth has been faithful to practicing the four roots,
and she is now five years past her initial diagnosis. No
matter what happens in the future, her children and husband
have had five more years with this wonderful woman. The
four roots have given Elizabeth hope.
~ Real Happiness ~
Discovering and nourishing the four roots is about living a
life of real happiness, balance, and freedom by creating
choices in your life that will nourish and sustain the four
roots of happiness. Health is living a lifestyle of
freedom, happiness, and balance. Discovering the four roots
of real happiness is about learning practices that connect
you to your Source, to your Self, and to others. These
practices have been tried and tested for thirty years by
others and I have worked with them for more than 15 years
on a variety of individuals and groups.
At the annual meeting of the American Society of Clinical
Oncology in May of 2005, one of the major headlines of the
conference was about simple lifestyle interventions in
cancer, not only to ward off disease, but to help those who
already have cancer. Simple steps in your lifestyle, such
as cutting the fat in your diet and exercising, were shown
to reduce the risk of cancer's recurrence. Your diet and
exercise are two of the essential roots to balance and
happiness.
I invite you to learn about the four roots of health and
happiness. The wonderful thing is that you don't have to
have a critical condition to learn about this lifestyle. It
is the optimal wellness program for health, longevity, and
happiness. By exploring how to live a lifestyle grounded in
these four roots -- by developing your S.E.L.F. -- you will
be more complete, more balanced, and more mindful in every
aspect of your life. More fulfilled and more capable of
giving and receiving love -- and really experiencing
happiness.
Copyright ©2006 by Kathleen Hall. All rights reserved.
Reprinted here with permission of the publisher, AMACOM,
http://www.amacombooks.org. Please feel free to duplicate
or distribute this file, as long as the contents are not
changed and this copyright notice is intact.
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Dr. Kathleen Hall (Clarkesville, GA) earned a Masters of Divinity from Emory University and a Doctorate in Spirituality from Columbia Theological Seminary. She has worked with battered women, the homeless, and AIDS patients at shelters and hospitals in Atlanta. She is an ordained Protestant minister. She studied under Nobel Peace Prize winners President Jimmy Carter, the Dalai Lama, Bishop Desmond Tutu, Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh, and other renowned spiritual leaders. She completed coursework with medical pioneers, including Dr. Herbert Benson of the Mind/Body Medical Institute at Harvard, Dr. Dean Ornish of The Preventative Medicine Institute, Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn of the Center for Mindfulness at the University of Massachusetts, and Dr. Jean Houston of the International Institute for Social Artistry.
